Continually Evaluate

I will begin always with my end in mind , so that I may CONTINUALLY EVALUATE what the true priorities are in MY life, taking care not to be a second hander or a people pleaser.

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Modern life can be very hectic to say the least. Sometimes it feels like "the tail is wagging the dog, rather than the dog wagging the tail."

Because of this, it's only too easy to get caught up into repeating routines, out of sheer habit, long after the time where those routines have stopped producing desired results, or even more tragically, after the results we once desired are no longer our true priorities.

That's why keeping our "end in mind", what we ultimately want to accomplish, as well as making sure we are not confusing means and ends will give us the proper long term perspective. An example of confusing means and end is someone who has a goal of making a million dollars. This is not an end, it is simply a means to the end of improving life quality by giving choices, dignity, as well as the end of personal growth through overcoming the challenges that it takes to accomplish that "means". (all contributing to your highest moral purpose: your own happiness.)

That's why it is imperative to "continually evaluate" not only the effectiveness of our methods, but, as mentioned above, whether the "desired results" of the past, are still the results we desire.

Evaluating is when we step back and look at the bigger picture to ask, "What's it all about, Alfie?"

Doing this should prevent the insanity of "repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results" or what Stephen Covey referred to as "being busy climbing the ladder of success, only to get to the top and find that it is leaning against the wrong wall."

Also, by always being clear about our end in mind and the corresponding priorities that go with accomplishing it, we will remain motivated by a crystal clarity of purpose.

In future entries, I will visit how all this ties into the three cardinal principles as described by Ayn Rand: Reason, Purpose and Self-Esteem.

Thanks again for reading.

Begin With MY End in MInd

I will BEGIN ALWAYS WITH MY END IN MIND, so that I may continually evaluate what the true priorities are in MY life, taking care not to be a second hander or a people pleaser.

Note: Credit to Stephen Covey... Habit #2 of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Begin with the end in mind.

Note: Credit to Ayn Rand.... "MY".

At this time, with the passing of Stephen Covey, even though I eventually came to disagree with some of his core premises, I obviously need to acknowledge the profound effect his teachings have had on my life, as reflected throughout the mission statement, the elaboration on which, form the nucleus of this blog.

Beginning with the end in mind, reflects the proper use of the mind in exercising the uniquely human ability to imagine various future outcomes to our choices and based on this, to choose the action that is most likely to result in our desired outcome.

That desired outcome may be based on a very short time frame, such as what we wish to accomplish in a given day, or even in one telephone conversation, but any short term goal, in order to conform to this principle, must also align with our ultimate life mission. (and this assumes one has taken the time to deliberately decide what that is)

While the details of life missions will be unique to each individual, I believe that everyone's highest moral purpose is the achievement of his own happiness. This principle comes from the influences of Ayn Rand who would have rejected Stephen Covey's religious premises.

This selfish outlook however, can only be accomplished in alignment with proper principles, meaning, in conjunction with a win win outlook (habit 3) which is, in my opinion, pretty much identical to Rand's rejection of sacrifice, either that of the individual to others, or of others to the individual.

MY end is my primary purpose, but I emphasize that MY end cannot be accomplished in a vacuum, and my happiness is maximized through my collaboration with, and through my loving relationships with the people that I choose to travel with on my life journey.

Rand saw principles as being aligned with objective reality and Covey saw his god as being the source of principles, but quickly added that many people, even in his own organization, while agreeing with the principles themselves, had differing opinions as to the source of those principles.

He pointed out that he not only accepted people's rights to hold differing opinions to his, but held them in reverence based on the fact that this was part of each person's quest to reach for the best within themselves.

Ayn Rand did once say in an interview with Phil Donohue, that she liked the expressions "Thank God." and "God Bless You.", not because she took them literally as she did not accept the supernatural, but because it reflected the "highest possible"

Thanks for reading.

Golden Opportunities in Disguise

I will be proactive and grateful, so that I may remain aware of, and profit from, all aspects of reality, ESPECIALLY those GOLDEN OPPORTUNITIES, that may be DISGUISED as hardships or problems.

In this blog, I strive to bring something to the reader that will be new and not rehash things that have been said countless times before. In this case, everyone, has heard, "look on the bright side of things", "the grey cloud with the silver lining" and "when one door closes, a window opens", which obviously are all variations on my title.

This is not to say that I don't agree with these; I emphatically do, but in my effort to bring something new, I want to truly accent the perspective that focuses on these in such a way as to actually look forward EXCITEDLY to "setbacks".

I bold the word "ESPECIALLY" above, to point out that I believe we need to go way beyond accepting and dealing with these things, all the way to realizing that in the long run, most of us will look back on these as the things that provided us with the most important lessons of our lives. Tony Robbins does say, "when we win, we party, and when we lose, we ponder"..... and if we "ponder" properly we can perhaps gain beyond our wildest expectations.

How many people have had their hearts broken only to go on and find the love of their lives and realize they were in a dysfunctional relationship; or been devastated to have been fired from a job, only to start the business they should have started years before.

There is a saying, "some day we will look back at this and laugh, so why not laugh now?"..... well, in that same vein, if "some day we will look back and realize this was a golden opportunity in diguise, why not have our antennas on to recognize and act on it, right now!

Reality (part 2) (dedicated to Karla Angott)

I will be proactive and grateful, so that I may remain aware of, and profit from, all aspects of REALITY, especially those golden opportunities that may be disguised as hardships or problems.

I blogged briefly back in early May on REALITY.

http://heroofyourlife.blogspot.ca/2012/05/reality.html

At the time, I pasted in the comments section a quote from my friend Karla Angott, who has since lost her battle with cancer. These comments and others that she shared on Facebook showed that, throughout, she maintained a positive attitude, and acted heroically. Can cancer be a "golden opportunity"?

I admit that is a stretch, and yet, the legacy she left behind in showing her daughter a phenomally courageous power of example will no doubt inspire her for life.

She also inspired all those surrounding her near and far, not only to be courageous in their own lives, but to continue to work towards acquiring the technology to defeat this terrible disease.

Death is an inevitable part of reality, and, as such, actually defines life. (if we lived forever, life would be infinite, but life is finite, and as such is "defined" by death.) How we deal with our greatest "hardship or problem" will put any other challenges into perspective (don't sweat the small stuff). It also defines our own life in the sense of how valuable it is, precisely because it is finite, reminding us to cherish every moment, every loved one, and yes, every challenge or problem, while we can, for all are opportunities if we only look at them in the correct way.

Thanks Karla for sharing your strength and inspiring us. I only knew you briefly, but I salute your HEROism.

PROFIT

I will be proactive and grateful, so that I may remain aware of, and PROFIT FROM, all aspects of reality, especially those golden opportunities that may be disguised as hardships or problems.

PROFIT is a controversial term. This is unfortunate because the fact that it is controversial shows that not only is its meaning not well understood, which wouldn't be that bad, but that it is often misinterpreted as EXPLOITING.

Companies and individuals often fall on one or the other side of this flawed concept; either they implicitly apologize for their profits by communicating that their goals are otherwise, and that profit is almost a necesary evil, or conversely they seek to achieve gains ruthlessly by pursuing strategies that are not in everyone's best interests, especially not their own in the long run. Actually, many actually sit on the fence doing both.

This is also tragic because this misunderstanding is, in my opinion, at the root of why many salespeople fail despite great work ethic and talent, due to succumbing to "fear of rejection". They fear being rejected, because at some level, they believe their motives must fall into being described as either altruistic or exploitive, and, suspecting that what they do is the latter, they lack the courage of their convictions, and go through their careers with one foot on the brake and one foot on the gas.... (sometimes only on the brake, which results in short careers.)

These beliefs are based on a scarcity mentality, in which people believe that if one party profits, the other party must lose.

In a proper, abundance mentality, it is not only possible, but practical and optimal for both parties to gain. In fact, long term success MUST be based on this principle. That doesn't mean that my ultimate purpose is to bring value to others per se (although I may well enjoy doing so), but that I recognize that the best way for me to maximize my own profits, long term, in a way that will also maximize my happiness as a human being, is to bring maximum value to the parties who choose to do business with me. This will result in people paying top dollar for my service as well as repeat business and referrals.

I am using business dealings as an aspect to which most of us would be familiar, but in our dealings with "all aspects of reality", the principle will always hold true.

Thanks again for reading.... I hope you may have derived some PROFIT from doing so.

REMAINING AWARE

I will be proactive and grateful, so that I may REMAIN AWARE of, and profit from, all aspects of reality, especially those golden opportunities that may be disguised as hardships or problems.

REMAINING AWARE: One of the unfortunate ways in which most people choose to deal with problems or challenges (or reality in general) is to simply avoid thinking about them. This is tragic for more reasons than I would have time to list in one blog entry. People refer to being "in denial". As human beings, our capacity to think is what sets us apart from other species and is our tool of survival. Choosing to not fully utilize this capacity by avoiding dealing with things we perceive to be unpleasant or are simply inconvenient is akin to choosing not to live.
People sometimes choose to "deny" things and/or combine this with rationalization/justification for either not doing things they should, or doing things they should know better than to do. (often because they become enamored with their whims like the child who thows a tantrum when his mother tells him he can't have candy before dinner.)
The first act of evil that precedes any other is the decision not to think, and therefore this is the ultimate evil.
We should remember that once we have established something as a daily priority, (one that we realize will lead to succeeding at living a full and happy life) and we fail to execute that priority on any given day, any justification other than a true crisis we may use, is simpy an attempt to avoid being aware that we simply chose not to live in alignment with our values that day. Developing the habit of doing this leads to sure disaster.
By being proactive and grateful and looking for the opportunity in every situation, (which is always there), we recognize the advantages of always being aware of reality (of always CHOOSING to THINK),and we reap countless benefits for doing so.
The irony is that we not only gain nothing from denial but always create larger problems instead.
There is nothing so unpleasant to deal with, that we can't make it worse by avoiding it.
As Ayn Rand put so eloquently: "I'm not brave enough to be a coward."

Thanks again for reading.

Being grateful for GRATITUDE!

I will be proactive and GRATEFUL, so that I may remain aware of, and profit from, all aspects of reality, especially those golden opportunities that may be disguised as hardships or problems.

In an earlier post, I suggested that gratitude, more than just a great perspective on things, can be an actual solution to many challenges, that is, if your ultimate goal is to have a happy life.

In the classic movie, "White Christmas", starring Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Rosemary Clooney and Vera Ellen, there is a great scene where Crosby's character spends time with Clooney's character when the two of them are drinking warm milk to deal with a bout of insomnia.  Bing breaks into a song about counting his blessings when he can't sleep.  

I love the word gratitude; I am in fact grateful for gratitude.  I, in fact, often do, exactly what the Bing suggests if I can't sleep because I am allowing some problem (imagined or real) to keep me tossing and turning.  It works amazingly well.... and even if I don't actually fall asleep, I choose to relish just how comfortable my bed and pillow is, and how fortunate I am to feel safe in my bed, due to living in a time and place where acts of crime or war would be extremely irregular, as opposed to a legitimate concern during most parts of history, and in many places even today.

I try to make a point of remembering what may seem mundane such as indoor plumbing, toilet paper and electric lights, along with the more precious, such as my health and safety and that of my loved ones.... and of course the love of my loved ones. I relish the many wonders and luxuries that modern technology has made possible and provides me with an unprecedented quality of life.

I remember and am thankful for the philosophers who helped us recognize that  individual freedoms are proper, the men and women who fought and died for these principles, and the productive geniuses who, thanks to the preconditions of this freedom were able to create the technologies I mentioned before.

I could go on and on, but my goal is to keep these entries short enough for people to read them in one sitting, and hopefully be grateful for getting something out of them.

THANKS to you for reading!